Energy

I am feeling better and more energetic and optimistic and productive than I have in a long time.  I am conscious of this, and grateful and trying to ride the wave and get a lot done, but I really don't know why I feel like this, so my Scandinavian pessimism is telling me not to get used to this. A piece of me is waiting for the bubble to burst.

Is it the spring weather in February? Shouldn't I feel guilty for enjoying it so, when it's a symptom of the ill-health of the planet? Is it something I'm doing physically, my diet, my vitamins, my sleep, my exercise? Is it something I'm doing mentally/emotionally, meditating, connecting with family, connecting with friends, planning a fun vacation, rationing my media consumption, listening to great music and reading only fun books? If it is driven by my actions, which ones? How do I keep this up? If driven by externals, it's surely not the state of the country, which is in dire peril and makes me feel helpless when I allow myself to dwell on it, which I don't. Clearly the absence of any major immediate family crisis is part of it. My work is probably at least partly responsible, where it is urgent and busy and feels important and as if my personal contribution makes a difference to the part of our nation's commerce I work in (at least). And I'm making plans, and science says we sometimes gain more satisfaction from planning and deciding to act, rather than actually acting.

Not every thing nor every moment is coming up roses, of course, but when I pause and check in with myself, I have an underlying happiness that is burbling along. Sure wish I knew the formula for this, and could reproduce it at will. If I could bottle this and distribute to everyone I know, I would!